


Mall Santa Antics

by Fhujeth



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Christmas, Christmas Fluff, M/M, Mall Santa Claus
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-31
Updated: 2019-12-31
Packaged: 2021-02-27 13:00:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,685
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22047547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fhujeth/pseuds/Fhujeth
Summary: Lithuania has agreed to do a job for his nation. The job? Mall Santa.
Relationships: Lithuania/Poland (Hetalia)
Kudos: 15





	Mall Santa Antics

“I can’t believe you roped me into this.” Poland tugged at the Christmas-green outfit that he’d wormed his way into.“I’m like, totally, one-hundred precent taken aback,” he added, adjusting the striped tights he was wearing. The things you agreed to for love. 

“It’ll be fun!” Lithuania buttoned up his red Santa suit, making sure he had added in extra padding to look Jolly. “Maybe…” Lithuania had agreed to help bring a more Western vibe to a small Vilnius Mall his boss adored. Family, fun, and friends were all on his Boss’ mind, and Lithuania was immediately on board with the idea of aiding in holiday cheer. “I’ve always seen these Santa Clauses in movies, so I don’t think it can be that hard.”

Poland pulled out a pocket mirror and checked his makeup. He’d been careful to look wintery, giving himself decorative eyeshadow and liner. He’d even done his best to blend the latex elf ears on so that they looked natural. His fashion skill gave him the perfect edge for being an elf, and he was sure to convince at least one child of his authenticity. 

“Does my wig look alright?” Lithuania adjusted the white curly hair over a hairnet, not exactly sure where or how to pin it in. He was a man of nature, not synthetic hairpieces, and his clumsy adjustments showed it.

“Um…” Poland gave a solid look over at Lithuania’s ‘hair’ and leaned in to adjust it, sticking a few bobby pins in with care. “You look pretty weird with white hair.” He grinned, fixing the curls. “Remember when we totally had to wear them back centuries ago?” He gave one final look over. “Looking back on all that, I can’t believe it showed dignity or something. They were totally gross.”

Lithuania’s wig bounced as he nodded. Though he hadn’t worn them often, social pressures had forced him at points to wear them. “They were kind of itchy,” he said as he admired his new ‘do in the mirror. “This one is kind of itchy too…” he grumbled. “But it’s only for the weekend, so I’m sure it’ll be okay… Besides, I look kind of fancy, don’t I? Like England.”

“Those two things totally shouldn’t go in the same sentence together.” Poland leaned towards the mirror, fidgeting with the strange cap on his head. “England and fancy.” He grinned slyly, and in trying to hold back a laugh occupied his mouth by giving Lithuania a kiss on the cheek. “This is totally just for the weekend, right?”

Lithuania returned Poland’s kiss with a warm smile. “That’s what I was told,” said Lithuania, his voice muffled as he pulled the Santa beard up around his face. “I think he said there was a guy from last year who was supposed to show up, but he cancelled last minute or something.” He wrestled with the beard a while longer before giving up on it with a defeated huff. “I look even more British now, don’t I?” 

Poland took pity on Lithuania’s struggling and took a moment to fix his beard for him. “You totally look your age,” he teased him as he finished, and then he went back to admiring his own cute outfit in the mirror. The green velvet gave him a youthful shine that his companion lacked. He caught another glimpse of Lithuania’s costume and snorted a laugh. “You know, like, old.” 

“Old??” Lithuania retorted. “As far as I know, you’ve got at least a good century on me.” He yanked the hat on over his wig. “Maybe you should be dressed as Santa and I should be the cheery elf.” 

Poland glanced at Lithuania, his face suddenly stern. “Old is a feeling, and it’s def a vibe I have gotten from you, Santa Claus.” He swooped in for another kiss but found nothing but artificial hair. “Your handsome face is totally covered up.".

“Good,” was all Lithuania said as he pulled Poland in for a hug, likewise failing to kiss him through the beard. 

“We’re supposed to start soon, right?” said Poland. Despite everything that was going on, Poland hadn’t the faintest idea what he had signed up for. He knew vaguely how it went in the movies and he knew kids were involved. Something about asking for presents and sitting on Santa’s lap. “I just have to stand there and look cute, right?”

Just as Lithuania was about to open his mouth, a man dressed in professional-looking business attire walked in. He wore a nice suit, as grey as his hair, and a nice matching tie. He looked friendly, homely, and about as polite as you could get. However, that didn’t stop Poland from jumping a bit at the man’s sudden entrance and causing him to shift slowly behind Lithuania.

“Ah, Tolvydas, great, you look fantastic.” The man seemed to know Lithuania without an introduction. “Your boss told me great things about you.” He spoke to Lithuania, holding out a hand to shake it. “He said you’re a real ‘man of the country’.” 

Lithuania blushed under his beard and shook the other man’s hand, “I do what I can!” He smiled, a bit embarrassed to be seen like this. 

“And this is your friend?” The man asked politely, looking towards Poland with a genuine smile, “Feliksas?” 

Poland didn’t recognize himself as Felkisas, so he didn’t bother listening in on the conversation. Of all the names he was called, ‘Feliksas’ wasn’t one he normally heard. It was ‘Feliks’ in Lithuanian, but ‘Feliks’ was also a name he was so rarely called that even then he had trouble recognizing it. For human names, he was more used to a stern ‘Łukasiewicz!!’ being screamed at him. Besides that, he didn’t know this man, and even if he seemed nice, he was still a stranger.

“Ah, yeah…” Lithuania gave Poland a firm nudge that read more like a ‘pay attention’ than anything else. “He’s a bit shy--”

“Well, he better get over that shyness.” Poland jumped when he heard those words. “He’ll be introducing Santa Claus to all the kids out there and taking their picture with you.” He slapped Lithuania on the back and said, “We’ve got faith in you, Tolvydas.”

Lithuania smiled politely. “I’ll do my best, sir.”

With that, the man walked out of the room, leaving Poland and Lithuania to their own devices once again. 

“Ah…” Lithuania turned to Poland, a bit of worry on his face. “Hmm…”

Poland’s heart was still racing, but he wasn’t about to not do the job. He had sworn to Lithuania that he’d do it-- Well, rather, he had said he would do it, and he was a man who liked to stand by his words. He’d just need an easy solution to get over the irrational fear of people.

Poland's anxiety must have shown, because Lithuania soon cleared his throat and said, “You won't be interacting with them for long… Just think of it as a script. They’re not even strangers, they’re just people that come and go.”

Poland turned away, then looked back at Lithuania. Suddenly the whole idea didn’t sound like fun. “I know…” he muttered. “W-What if I mess up taking the picture, or I end up saying the wrong thing, or the child bites me or something?” 

Lithuania gave Poland a look at the last comment and sighed, “You’re not going to mess up. You don’t even need to impress anyone.”

“What if they think I talk weird?” Poland’s mind began to swarm with silly thoughts. He did talk weird. His Lithuanian was different and he had a Polish accent. “What if--”

Lithuania put his finger over Poland’s mouth, insisting he stop with the nonsense. “If anything goes wrong, I’ll be right there to defend you.” Lithuania reassured, “Unless you majorly mess up, then you’re on your own.” He adjusted his beard. “Like, swear in front of the children or drop a baby.” 

“Promise?” Poland gulped, taking a deep breath and adjusting his own outfit as he stared into Lithuania’s trusting green eyes.

“Nope.” Lithuania took Poland by the hand and tugged him out towards the Christmas setup. “You’ll be fine.”

Poland let out a small squeak as he was pulled out into the white, cotton covered stage. A large chair and decorative tree covered in beautiful ornaments was set out alongside other holiday decorations. Outside, a group of parents with their children waited eagerly in line for a visit with Santa Claus.

\---

“What do we do?” Poland crept closer to Lithuania, as if that would protect him from the crowd. “Do we run?”

Lithuania shifted where he stood. “Why did I agree to this?” 

“Because you have a problem,” Poland muttered back. His legs couldn’t budge. Even if the soldier could run through bullets and buildings crashing around him, he was incapable of getting away from strangers. Somehow his body would seize with tension at docile and harmless civilians he’d have to interact with over strange soldiers he’d either have to fight alongside or kill. “Say something.”

The crowd looked towards the two on the set expectantly. They knew what to expect. Well, they knew what they wanted to expect, and right now that wasn’t happening. Instead, they had been met with two confused men in Christmas costumes.

“Merry Christmas!” Lithuania said, the cheer that should have been in his voice replaced by anxious trembling. “As you can see, I don’t make it out of the South Pole very often.”

“North,” Poland corrected under his breath, in a way the crowd wouldn’t be able to hear. “Santa Claus lives in the North Pole…”

Lithuania mused on that thought for a moment. “Right, the North Pole!” He corrected himself. “The South Pole is where I keep my summer house.” He laughed awkwardly, hoping something would save him from this situation he had put himself in. “My favourite Elf, Po, and I have come from far away to bring you Christmas Cheer!” At this point, Lithuania had no idea what he was saying. He just didn’t want to let down his children. “Right… Po?”

Poland nodded enthusiastically, but it was more out of sheer terror than it was in sincerity. “There are other elves, but I’m his favourite.” Poland did his best to force down his anxiety. He could feel the sweat on his forehead and felt thankful he’d chosen waterproof makeup for the day. “Because I’m totally the cutest and, like, hardest working elf in the entire Kingdom.”

“That’s right!” Lithuania shuffled towards his ‘throne.'“So we’ve come to hear your Christmas Wishes and let you take a picture with me… Santa Claus.” 

As Lithuania sat down, Poland moved towards the gate and looked at the first child. He was a small boy, about three years old. He, too, looked a bit scared and turned away into his mom when Poland looked at him.

“It’s okay, Jonas… It’s Santa Claus and his friendly elf,” the mother of the three-year-old said to her son as she coddled him. “See how friendly Santa looks?” 

Lithuania did have a friendly, albeit nervous look on his face. Thankfully, at least for Lithuania, his face was hidden mostly by his beard. Poland, on the other hand, had a frozen, nervous look on his face. That, paired with his natural ‘resting bitch face’ made him look a bit more intimidating than he had intended. In fact, he looked a bit less adorable than he believed himself to be.

“So, you, like, want to take your picture with Santa?” Poland was able to get out of his mouth, his Slavic accent only adding a little more intimidation to his presence. 

Lithuania gave a friendly wave towards the child. “Merry Christmas! Don’t be shy. Ha. Ha. Ha.” He messed up what should have been a jolly ‘ho, ho, ho.’

Jonas turned even more towards his mother in fear. “Elf is scary…” He held his mother’s hand.

“No I’m not…” Poland wanted to retort further, but he could sense Lithuania already requesting he hold back. Even though this was a child, that wouldn’t stop Poland's temper boiling over. Instead, he knelt down to get to the child’s level and took a deep breath. “You-- You wanted to meet Santa Claus, right?”

Jonas nodded but clung tightly to his mother. “Santa seems nice but you seem scary ” he said again. 

“I’m sorry,” the mother interrupted. “He’s usually not like this…” She nudged her son. “The friendly elf is going to take you to meet Santa. You don’t want to make Santa Claus get out of his chair and come see you, do you?”

“It’s really okay!” Poland smiled lightly and held out his hand towards the child as if the child were a small cat and not a human. “See? I’m friendly!”

Jonas’ eyes began to fill with tears as he looked at Poland’s hand and touched it.

“See, he’s just like you or me.” Jonas’ mother smiled and bent down and touched Poland’s hand too. “He’s a nice elf. Remember, they make presents for all the good children out there,” she added. 

Poland nodded nervously. “So, want to meet Santa?” He tried again to give a friendly smile. “I know the other kids do too,” he added, tossing a glance at the grumbling line behind them. “So let’s go!”

Jonas stepped forward and this time took Poland’s hand. “Ok…” he finally agreed.

Poland sighed with relief and lead the child to see ‘Santa.'

Lithuania had a confused and worried look on his face as he stared at the boy.

“Hi Santa…” Jonas said as he let Poland pick him up and sit him on Santa's lap. His lower lip trembled terribly. Poland stepped towards the camera, glad he was done dealing with that for now. All he’d have to do was take a picture.

Lithuania gave an assuring smile and sat with the child on his lap. “Have you been a good little boy this year?” He patted the child on the head.

“Yes,” Jonas replied. “Really good!”

“...and eating your veggies?” Lithuania continued. He might as well use this time to get an idea about how some of his children were being raised.

The boy remained silent. He did not eat his vegetables.

“Have you been studying hard in school?”

Now Jonas was confused. He was three. He didn’t go to school. “I want a train!” he exclaimed, ignoring the questions, “...and Pikachu!”

Lithuania didn’t know where to go from there. He didn’t know what a Pikachu was. He did know what a train was, however, and thankfully, he had a bag of small 1 Euro toys by his side, and inside, he happened to have a toy train. “I think I have something.” He nervously reached into the bag at his side and pulled out the train. “Just for you.” He handed Jonas the toy train.

Jonas’ face lit up as he admired the toy train and Lithuania felt relaxed and happy he’d been able to bring some light to the small Lithuanian boy’s day. 

“I’ll take your picture with Santa now, okay? So at the count of three…!” Poland called out.

Jonas nodded and both turned to the camera.

“3...2...1… Say Cheese!” 

“Cheese!!” Lithuania and Jonas said together as Poland took the picture.

Afterwards, Lithuania smiled towards the child and set him down on the ground. “Now, be a good boy this year! Do your best, ok?” He patted the child on the head while Poland made his way back over to lead the child to his mom.

“Okay, Santa!!” Jonas replied, letting Poland lead him back to his mom. 

“That wasn’t so scary, was it?” Jonas’ mom bent down and looked at the train in her son’s arms. “What do you say to Santa and the Elf?”

“Thank you!” Jonas called out, “Bye-bye!” He added.

Poland sighed relief as he watched Jonas and his mom walk off. “Aaa.” He moved towards Lithuania for a moment. “I’m like, totally glad that’s over with.”

“What do you mean?” Lithuania motioned towards the line and sighed with disappointment. “We’ve only just begun…”


End file.
